Comments for Irascible Ink

Comment on We All Fall Down by Heather J

Heather J — Sun, 24 Jul 2011 02:35:40 +0000

I totally relate to #2. I think it is really really common for people with chronic health issues of any kind that stretch back to childhood. I got the “let her do what she feels able to do” advice from my doctor (to my parents) and turned that into – “if I do more than I am able to do, I beat the disease, the disease doesn’t beat me.” Well that works, until it doesn’t. My body is sadly paying the price now for softball games I had no business pitching and a host of sports I shouldn’t have attempted as my back screamed at me to stop. It was irrational at the time, and I knew it, but it was personal. I kept thinking it was a mind over matter thing and I could just will the disease into submission. It really doesn’t work that way and at some point your body just refuses to cooperate and just like you said it feels like a crushing failure. It’s not. I get that. You get that. But getting it rationally and internalizing it in a meaningful way are really different things. I still struggle with it. Cheesy though it may be, I kind of call the “accept what you cannot change” piece of the serenity prayer to mind when I get down about it. I can change a lot of things, some with hard work, some with better self care, but I cannot obliterate my disease and make it go away. I can manage it. If you get to a place of insight on really buying into it completely and not struggling with the feelings of personal failure, I’d love to hear about it – I am not all the way there yet myself.

Comment on You’re Plastic, and That’s a Good Thing by aspasia

aspasia — Wed, 23 Mar 2011 20:18:00 +0000

Excellent sleuthing, supernerd! But don’t give your humanities training such a bad rap. It’s exactly how you were able to formulate an extremely concise and thoughtful question, and determine when you’d found suitable evidence for an answer…
It’s all about critical thinking, mama, and that you’ve got in spades!!

Comment on About by W

Tue, 15 Mar 2011 17:38:49 +0000

Bee! Really interesting reads, glad we got to chat last weekend. Let’s meet up soon for drinks!

Comment on Anger: The Ultimate Speed Bump by barryminimum

barryminimum — Sat, 05 Feb 2011 18:37:59 +0000

I don’t mind at all. . .in fact I’m thrilled that they are useful, inspirational etc. I think the thing that has been most helpful to me in dealing with the anger is to recognize that it’s completely normal and natural. And that getting angry is some times the best thing you can do for yourself. Like the CP itself, I try think of the anger not as a problem that will be solved or a condition that can be cured, but instead it’s something to manage. And like managing physical pain, it’s important to look at the source of the anger and see what you can do to address problems at the source. And if the source of the anger is something you can’t fix or accept right now—I’m with you, tap into it and use it in any way you can. I find that anger, as fuel, burns itself out pretty quickly and is often replaced by better fuels like pride and ambition.

Comment on Anger: The Ultimate Speed Bump by Jesus

Jesus — Tue, 01 Feb 2011 02:32:59 +0000

I hope you don’t mind me going through your entries, every now and then, I find them very inspirational.

We are very alike you and I you know. I have also had the same feelings about the “old anger” Even up to this day. I have found ways, to control it, or so I think. I guess you could say that I try to harness its destructive power and use it for something constructive. It’s an incredible fuel that really GETS ME GOING!!! but every now and then, I look back and ask myself. Maybe this is wrong, maybe I’m just hurting myself even more. Not in the short term, but in the long term. but if so, how do I get rid of it? and what else can I use as a motivation? it’s destructive power can’t be underestimated, it feels like using the “Dark side of the Force” in Star Wars. Like you, I have no idea where to start.

Comment on What is to Give Light by barryminimum

barryminimum — Sun, 19 Dec 2010 04:33:35 +0000

Absolutely. Like you, I’ve spent many years dealing with these kinds of ridiculous people. . .sadly yesterday my big mouth and my strong funny bone both failed me. (Like you I’ve also found these tools to be the best ones for dealing with serious tools like that moron. )

Comment on What is to Give Light by Jesus Pinto

Jesus Pinto — Sat, 18 Dec 2010 18:26:37 +0000

Wow! what an experience. This brings up many memories, if it makes you feel any better “just be glad you are a woman” I have always had a big mouth, and some would argue, that I still do. Long ago, when I was still victim of these jokes, I would get so furious that I would start insulting them back. This led to a small fight, which I would almost always loose. I lost count on how many times I had this happen to me. but, just know this, when you are a guy you feel compelled to defend your honor, in some way and it took a lot of self control (and a lot of beating) to look for an alternative strategy.

From the start, I knew that I couldn’t just ignore them, you just can’t!!! and since I couldn’t fight them, There was only one other way to go. I had to find a way to have them laugh with me, instead of laughing “at” me, and to do this I had to feel VERY confortable with my body and its limitations. When I learned to “laugh at myself” infront of other people, things really began to change.

so when someone starts making fun of the way I walk, I just laugh and say something like “You know, that’s not the first time I hear this” or “I know man, I’m totally fucked up”

-Jesus

Comment on From the Inside Out by JDB881

JDB881 — Thu, 16 Dec 2010 17:23:18 +0000

I read and am glad you are willing to share your experiences. Even so, if it is an exercise that serves your needs, what is wrong with that?

Comment on Float like a Butterfly, Sting Like a Bee by Mandy

Mandy — Tue, 26 Oct 2010 20:41:51 +0000

So happy to hear that you’re making progress! I’m not surprised! And glad to hear that enthusiasm I know so well!

Comment on Float like a Butterfly, Sting Like a Bee by Frank

Frank — Wed, 20 Oct 2010 19:58:05 +0000

…didn’t know whether you were the boxer or the bag? This is awesome news. I am so thrilled for you that the setback was a temporary one, and a result of progress. Excellent.